9 days!! 9 days and I will be on a plane heading across the world for a completely new chapter in my life full of so many unknowns! Excitement, Eagerness, Anticipation, Not quite ready... Only a few words I can pick out to describe how I feel. So much will be new for me there, yet I think the people around the world have a lot more in common than most realize or admit. Brokenness is universal. Pain is universal. Everyone wants to be loved for who they are. These realities and desires are not contingent on culture or location.
I got one of those livingsocial coupons to get a manicure/pedicure for half price, so I went for my appointment this morning. The woman who did my nails was outgoing and easy to talk to. 33 years old and looked just like Kate Hudson- she was beautiful. Yet the more we talked the more her eyes revealed her pain and brokenness. She's been a mom since 17- absolutely loves her kids, but never had a chance to really grow up herself. She said several times that she would have loved to travel the world… one day she hopes. She is unhappy in her marriage but wants her 5 year old daughter to have her daddy… she longs for freedom and independance. She longs for someone she can fully trust and depend on. My heart went out to her so much. I wanted to shout- "It's ok, I have the solution! Commit your life to God and He will be your freedom. He can bring renewal to your marriage. Fulfillment to your life! You can fully trust God and he will never ever forsake you!" Yet, I sensed that would only bring out her defenses. Instead I sat there, listening attentively, asking questions, trying to let my eyes communicate the words I wanted to say. I wanted her to know how much God values her and loves her. I wanted her to know that there is no condemenation in Christ Jesus for those who believe. Before I left I told her that I would be praying for her. She showed authentic appreciation. Brokenness is universal.
"God, how can I shout your name in Cambodia? How can I bring You into people's brokenness if I don't even know how to do that in my own home?"
'Be still and know that I am God, I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” (Psalm 46:10)
"Lord, help me to be still, even amongst the chaos of injustice, and the stirring in my heart to go to war. May I wait patiently for you, Lord, becaus I know that YOU will act. Direct my steps no matter what soil I am on."
P.S. In less than 5 hours I get to see the man I am crazy about, Jordan 🙂 I can't wait!
Jenny, I have been so blessed reading your blogs! Not only am I experiencing some similar emotions, but you are so open, honest, and vulnerable. You commitment to and dependence on God simply bring me joy and push me to seek Him more. I love you, dear friend, and am so thankful to know you and watch you experience this adventure. I’m praying for you!
Brokenness is universal – what a great observation. it will serve you well in Cambodia.
Thanks for getting me thinking. I think that merits a blog post!
YAY for a week with Jordan and your family! 🙂 Praying for wonderful moments.
Also.
I think that “broken is universal” is something we should take into Cambodia on a wide variety of levels. It made me think that sometimes, when were just with american’s or other foreigners in Cambodia, we’ll have to remember that truth. Because they, too, need redeemed from their own brokenness… whether it’s humanitarian workers, enslaved women, or traveling businessmen.
8 DAYS! (now)
Love you